The art of myth cool

"...turning the godhead of the ghols into a monument to Balin's victory. Nothing else has done more to sustain the mutual hatred since the ghols raided the crypt at Myrgard for 'victuals'."
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The art of myth cool

Post by toxyn »

The art of myth cool
Author: grim

An article I wrote after MWC05. Probably my most famous one!

Let's face it, some mythers just are cooler than others. There's no denying that fact. Some people wish to be myth cool like others, but just aren't. But how can I be myth cool?, - you ask. It's a complicated thing really and some people just aren't made for it. There are only few who can be truly myth cool, but you can do some stuff to make you seem cooler.

But let's define myth cool first, shall we? It is, of course, the most important type of cool you will ever need in life. The type of cool that gets you women is nothing compared to m2sbr and myth cool, that will make the myth lobby and forums bow before you. It is something that just comes along with time. You most certainly can not have any right when you start playing. It is the type of influence and power that doesn't depend on some "position of power", like being a PMA. In fact, being a PMA is usually a bad thing for your myth cool, since you lose respect by being one most of the time. People obey your will because of your position, but don't respect you. A truly myth cool individual can make things happen by making others do stuff simply with his charisma. Of course, being an admin doesn't neccesarely make you lose your myth cool, but most of the time it does. So in short, myth cool is your natural charisma, that will give you influece amongst the myth community without having any actual power behind you, like admin rights.

Being myth cool will make people listen to you and your forum success is guaranteed. You will be a true hero of the myth community, once you gain a myth cool status.

But what does it require to be myth cool? This is indeed a difficult question, and there is no perfect answer to this. But, I can give you some details, which most definatly help.

First of all, being myth cool doesn't depend on where you live. Your country of origin is somewhat irrelevant. If you're American, being a republican will most certainly lead to losing your myth cool. Republicans are too easily offended, since they are the types of people who tend to be offended by things. They also lack the sense of humor. (I am allowed to make rough generalizations like this, since I am myth cool.) There are some exceptions however, but I will get to that later. Overall, losing your temper is always bad for your myth cool.

Remaining agressively passive is a must have skill to obtain if you wish to be myth cool. Showing sings that you care too much and losing your temper is just not cool. Having a decent amount of care is still required however, but you should only show it in a cool way. Here's a small example how you can do this without caring too much:

Vegemite -wwii-: raz wtf u suk dood
Smoke =IX=: what kind ofa newb would split like that wtf
Raz: I am a champion of myth champions
Raz: the best let me captain all the time
Vegemite -wwii- : u still suk dood
Raz: (leaves it at that)

In this example, raz didn't actually say anything about the (assumed) game that just happened, but he let the two individuals, who clearly aren't myth cool, know that he is vastly better than them and their words mean nothing. He can do this without actually talking about the matter at hand, because he has myth cool. So from this example we learn that arguing with newbies is bad, just let them and others know your point in a vague way. You can however, keep arguing with them if you think it's the cool thing to do for the moment. This is sometimes the case.

Actually being good at myth isn't neccesary for being myth cool, but it helps alot, since alot of arguments involve myth skills to a certain degree, like in the example conversation presented. It is indeed a fact that most myth cool people are good at myth as well, but like I said, it isn't a must.

Having a good grasp of the english language and grammar is a good thing to have as well, but like myth skills, they aren't must haves. They just help a lot. If your native tongue is english, then having a bad grammar is obviously a very bad thing for your myth cool. Example:

Covert: i would like 2 get a car for houres and houres. dose you 2 asmo:(?
Asmo: ilol u know i do lol
Hitlow: oh my christ

Bunch of tards. But like I already mentioned, having good english skills isn't a must if you wish to be myth cool. Here's an example conversation:

Rawr IB: hahah, thor you're such a newbie, hahah
Rawr IB: What?
Tb: :)
THOR: orangutang anus, rawr big newb
Rawr IB: what???? I own you gdi, and speak english

Thor just owned rawr entirely in that conversation. Aside from THOR's excellent psychological games, Rawr also shot himself in the leg by saying that he "owns thor". Never directly say that you own someone. That is very uncool, unless it's said in a myth cool way (it can be said directly too, but usually being more clever than that is better). Example:

Will: 1vs1 anyone?
Limp: sorry, I own you, newb.
Will: fy, 1vs1
Limp: KöR
grim: KöR

... and Will just got owned. See what I mean? Here's a more subtle way to do it though.

Will: 1vs1 anyone?
Limp: sup champs
Sb: back 2 back
Will: damn :(

... and Will just got owned again. Poor Will. That reminds me, never go asking people for 1vs1 in the way will just did. If you really, for some unimaginable reason, wish to duel someone, do it like this.

Will: heheh, I owned in that game
Will: damn.... ok

See the difference? Thalander just threw the challenge, but made it unclear that if he really cares about it, or is he just messing around. Having the skill to make comments that will leave this impression is a must have.

Like I already mentioned in the very second paragraph of this article, being a myth veteran is a must have quality to be myth cool. If you just started, don't even dream about being myth cool. Knowing who's who and people knowing you is neccesary. People knowing you is more important than you knowing them, however. For example, everyone knows who Do$.MaN is, but I doubt he knew anyone really.

Overall, no one can be... told what Myth Cool is. You have to experience it yourself.

Here's a small list of people who have the myth cool. (I almost felt like saying "Here's a list of people who with the myth cool is strong", but that would be an out of place star wars quote that wouldn't be cool.) There are in no real order.

Raziel: Raz is the type of guy who can just go to the lobby and type something like Raz ~raz, and the lobby would just nod. He is the man who brought the excessive use of tildas to the community in the first place, and then it was continued by yours truly and Rabican. He can say pretty much anything and still look cool. Master of Vague comments.

Soulbligther: Despite the unoriginal name choise (to which he made up with the abrevation "sb"), this guy has myth cool. Despite being european, he is more like the american m2sbr branch of myth cool. See: limp and raz.

Oh and about name choises. Never use too much ascii in your name, that is not cool. Only Raz can pull off having alot of ascii in his name.

2tone: 2 tone has alot of myth cool as well. He is usually one of those people who starts fads or at least is one of the first to go along with the fad. One of the coinventors of THOR.

Tainted bliss: Needless to say more really. He is much like 2 tone, but only he is TB, and being TB is cool. He's not cool on his sober tuesdays, but those only happen once every 3 months or so. One of the coinventors of THOR.

Limp: Limp is just limp. Much like raz, he has been myth cool for years. He is in a position, like raz, to say what's cool and what's not. Only he actually uses this position more than raz, since raz doesn't do that directly. Really good with vague comments, but not as good as Raz. KöR

Erik: Uh, he's Erik. If you don't know why he's myth cool, please end yourself.

Ducky: See above. He lost some myth cool with a few forum posts, but he gained it all back with his last article. He is a, if not THE master of articles.

Thalander: The green freak is a man of the world, even though he's only 16. Speaks alot of languages and can provide some comedy gold. Also pretty good with the vague comments. His weakness is that he enjoys duels too much sometimes, aka he becomes Will.

Browning: Yes, even browning has myth cool. He is really good with being vague, specially when he's capping a team in a tournament. His team doesn't like this, but he has enough myth cool to keep capping regardless. And that is a true sign of myth cool.

Rabican: Coinventor of the tildas and that alone would put him on the list. He is very good with the vague comments and can provide some comedy gold as well (in finnish most of the time however).

Drizzt: Vague and Funny (in finnish), but sometimes in english too.

Zer: o rly?

Orlando the Axe: He was a gifted fanta artist, even though he did only a few movies. Very vague from time to time and can provide some comedy gold. Not sure about how good he is with the agressively passive behaviour, but I think he can do that as well. Not one of the highest rated people on the list, but he definatly deserves his spot.

THOR: The modern day myth oracle. When he enters the lobby or game, everyone is always eagerly waiting for his next comment. That is some true myth cool right there.

Ska: Possibly the most gifted fanta movie artist. Very good with being agressively passive, but most people don't notice this. Very funny man also.

Dante (not np dante): I don't think he played in bnet, but over the past few years he has developed into a myth cool person. He is funny, vague and can be agressively passive rather often. One of those people who you can go "what the fuck?" with from time to time.

Cruiser: not so active as of late, but this guy is probably one of the best at being agressively passive and vague.

There are alot of people who are cool who aren't on the list, but these are the main characters. Finally:

Me: Shameless self promotion is not myth cool, but I am cool enough to make it cool, newbs.

-coinventor of THOR
-coinventor of Do$.Man, BUT I ALONE MADE IT A PASSWORD.
-coinventor of Tildas.
-I hosted mwc03 and mwc04
-I invented THE ELFROID with Tb, but he elfroid got out of our hands
-Just being damn cool in general (vague, agressively passive and funny)

Eat it :E


People who got cut out of the list:

Clank: :(

Shinco: for being a dirty republican

Hitlow: Same as shinco.

Both Shinco and Hit would be on the main list otherwise.

People who try to be myth cool but are soooo not myth cool.


Will: Damn man... just damn man :/

The elfoid: You won't reach zappo, trust me. That guy is a machine.